The Places I've Cried in Public by Holly Bourne

Author:Holly Bourne
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Usborne Publishing Ltd

I couldn’t concentrate, but I made myself flick through the pages, refusing to apologize when I’d clearly done nothing wrong. Though I felt physically sick, something else rose in me too – my temper. Irritation laced my veins. I had thoughts I’d never had about him before. Thoughts like:

How dare you?

What the hell is going on?

What is wrong with you? This isn’t okay.

So, even though I felt nauseous and disorientated, my anger allowed me to damn well flick through my writing book, ignoring his stupid and totally uncalled-for strop. Because I still had guts back then, you see. Guts and self-worth, and a trust in my own version of events.

Reese strummed a chord.

I turned a page.

He played a chorus.

I reread a line and scribbled it out. It was one he’d written, and it wasn’t that good.

He sighed.

I pretended I hadn’t heard.

And then, finally, he looked up.

“Alright?” he asked, like there was no atmosphere between us at all. Like he hadn’t ignored me for fifteen minutes and sworn at me.

I plonked my book down onto my lap and crossed my arms. “Of course I’m not alright – you’re being a total dick.”

His face morphed from coldness into guilt, and, like a light switch, my boyfriend was back again. He strode over and dropped to his knees in front of me.

“Shit, Amelie. Sorry. Oh god, you’re really upset, aren’t you?”

I wiped under my eyes. “Of course I’m upset! You’ve ignored me since I got here, and you swore at me!”

“I know. I’m sorry. Seriously, I’m sorry.”

He clasped his hands over my cheeks and brought me in for a kiss. I turned my head. “No! What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing!”

I levelled him with a look. “Reese, come on.”

He sighed. “Okay, okay. It’s just…I had music this afternoon. And that fucking bitch Mrs Clarke has given me a D for my composition.” He shook his head and clasped my hands tighter and, oh, the relief. I can’t tell you what it felt like when that explanation tumbled out of his mouth. When he started being him again. My body gulped it in. It was over. Whatever that was, it was over. The universe made sense again.

“She what?”

“A D. I know! She said it was too simplistic. Can you believe that?”

A tiny part of me agreed with Mrs Clarke. Reese’s chorus did come in too soon and too heavy, and you could tell where the song was going to go within the first sentence. I didn’t tell him this, of course. Instead it was my turn to cradle his face.

“Aww, Reese, that sucks. I’m sorry. No wonder you’re upset.”

“I mean, what does that whore know? She’s a music teacher. If she was actually any good at music, she’d be out playing it, wouldn’t she? Not, like, fucking teaching it to loads of kids who are actually better than her.”

I flinched at his language but let him whinge it out, instinctively knowing not to pick him up on it now. In time, he settled himself down and pulled me onto his lap.

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